Friday, July 28, 2006

A hot cup of coffee on a hot day is a lot cooler than you think.
[Early nineties adverstising slogan, from the Russian]

Thursday, July 27, 2006

True fulfillment comes to those who don't pig out on bread first.

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

Tuesday, July 25, 2006

Brother fighting brother is civil war; brother dragging brother into small claims court is civil suit.

Friday, July 21, 2006

The man who makes up proverbs has way way too much time on his hands.

Thursday, July 20, 2006

Salad, soup, sandwich, snack: two steps forward, two steps back.
[from the Portuguese]

Wednesday, July 19, 2006

Tuesday, July 18, 2006

"Poetry is better than bad sex, but not as good as great sex."
(Saying popular in French brothels, apocryphally attributed to either Bauldelaire, or Mme. De Maisonlaina of the province of Arles)

Friday, July 14, 2006

Every empty chair is a chance to sit your big ass down.

Thursday, July 13, 2006

Run from a smiling crocodile; he is not smiling.
(from "Reptile Reminders" Page-a-Day Calendar, July 13, 2006)

Wednesday, July 12, 2006

Helium balloon drifts in the sky; somebody's toddler starting to cry.

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

Always stay seated until the hostage-negotiator leaves.

Monday, July 10, 2006

Martini with gin, like riding a schwinn; martini with vodka, a cab to Khamkatka.

Friday, July 07, 2006

He is best avoided who claims to have a "party in his pants."
[from the Latin]

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

Never leave the house without first feeding the python.
(from "Reptile Reminders" Page-a-Day Calendar, July 5, 2006)