Lose the hat, keep the cat, take the bus to Angkor Wat.

Warm your tush before the stove; the burning bush is just for Jove.

Travel by horse and remember the course.  Travel by Greyhound and get fleas from a backpack.

Who chooses to bathe in the soup will be licked by old Jewish men.

Shake the salt if it's your fault; shake the pepper to blame the leper.
(old Hawaiian saying)

Cannot the shortest among you see up the skirts of opportunity?
--Milton Snerver (1918 Republican presidential candidate)